Every day, Heart Chicago Cub Butterfly Love shirt. The deaths, the pain, the fears. How she’d leaned on me, and feared I’d leave her over it. How she’d found herself sleeping with the attending, and vowing to come clean and never do it again, but still, after another shift, did it. How she contemplated leaving the job, suicide, going into research. I vowed never to let work do me as it did her. And then, one night, after death and pain and fears, I slept with a nurse after my shift. I was single, then, but still.
Heart Chicago Cub Butterfly Love shirt, hoodie, sweater and v-neck t-shirt
Offical Heart Chicago Cub Butterfly Love shirt
I wouldn’t have done it, Heart Chicago Cub Butterfly Love shirt. I missed a friend’s wedding. I got paged back from a three-day skiing trip. I missed another friend’s birthday party outing, and I didn’t go to a good friend’s funeral. But I drank a bottle of Jack at his grave the next week, fell asleep there, got woken up by the Undertaker who drove me home. And that’s the day I vowed to really end it. Not my life, not my job, but the pain. Started writing about burnout and moral injury and work hazards as a physician or nurse. Applied for a Ph.D. program and got accepted in “Medical Philosophy, History, and Education” to research how medical schools can teach better, how hospitals can preserve their physicians and nurses’ sanity, and how we, as a society and culture, can stop fucking up those we rely on the most.